At some point in each of our lives, we have been in a long-distance relationship. Though long- distance relationships are traditionally viewed as romantic relationships, the definition can be extended to family and close friends. Whether it be from going away to college, studying abroad, moving for work, etc, the distance creates challenges in maintaining our relationships.
One of these challenges is the increased difficulty in communication. Though technology and social media have helped in effectively meeting this challenge, technology and social media have also had impacts on the nature of the relationships themselves.
Globalization shortens the distance between people all over the world via electronic communication and it has resulted in 'the death of distance'.
We are connected almost everywhere we go if we have a smartphone, PC, tablet, etc.
Prior to the advent of technology, communication within long-distance
relationships was primarily through letters and calls. These were somewhat
limited in nature and restrictive in amount (due to long turnover in letters and cost of long-distance calls).
With the introduction of video calls, e-mails and chatting, people are able to interact as much as they can. This hyper-connectivity allows us to “catch-up” with any person at any moment in time.
Facebook provides a vast amount of data, of which the 'relationship status’ and ‘current location’ are just a few examples.
I have heard several complaints from couples whose partners have refused to state their relationship status on such platform.
Or partners about their location; only for Facebook to 'disgrace' them. The interesting thing is they don't even know their location is on.
Also, people lie about the kind of phone they are using to chat. They upload a status or photo and Facebook says 'via BlackBerry' or 'via i-phone5s'.
If using the internet has an effect on our simplest social interaction (and some argue on our psychology and identity), then it must have an effect on the relationships that are being “kept alive” through social media means.
It seems that when relationships ‘go online’ with the best intentions, there are a lot more aspects to bear in mind.
Internet connections are often available and spreading the farthest corners of the earth. But what happens on days when the Internet connection is poor? It's frustrating right? You go like 'grrrrhhhh'. I know the feeling.
Getting access to the Internet isn't free. You have to buy a data bundle on your phone, tablet, or PC. Or buy 'airtime' at a café. For people who aren't working, how do they pay for Internet connection? Students deduct from their pocket money. Most people spend more money on data bundle than they do on food.
When someone’s boy/girlfriend uploads a picture of the opposite sex, it puts a strain on the relationship. This one is a surety, long-distance relationship or not. But in the case of a long - distance relationship, where you can't look into the eyes of your partner to know if he/she is lying (it works for some people) about who the person in the uploaded picture is, it wrecks havoc.
Moreover, the rate at which pornographic materials go viral these days is alarming. What do you do when you see such things on the facebook wall of your partner? Or when you receive such a message on facebook? This has damaged relationships not only between partners, but friends and familes.
After months or years of not seeing your partner, you finally do. Instead of trying to make up for the lost time, you go through his/her chats. You see something you don't like and demand an explanation. Whether the explanation is good or not, you still fight and argue.
While social networking sites make our partner of miles away almost be with us
through our phone/computer screens, does that really substitute the human contact?
Sure, keeping in touch is easier,
but how valuable is the virtual communication compared to physical presence? To what extent and how long will it suffice? What happens when you yearn for a cuddle with your partner?
Is cheating inevitable? I mean, even when both of you are in the same municipality, it's not easy. How much more in a long-distance relationship?
This article is dedicated to UyaiEyen Udoetim. Thank you, once again, for suggesting this topic.
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