Dear reader, welcome to my abode. It's so good to have you here. I hope you enjoy your stay.

9 February 2015

ARE HUSBANDS REALLY SCARCE?

Scarce is defined as 'uncommon, rare and difficult to find'.
We live in a society where pressure is put on a woman as soon as she clocks twenty-five years of age (sometimes, even less). She becomes desperate and is made a laughing stock. This is as a result of the cliché, husbands are scarce, which I interpret as men as scarce. Afterall, are men not husbands-to-be? Right.
Well, I'm not good with numbers, so I don't know if women are more populated than men in the world. However, that is not my problem and it really shouldn't be yours. Atleast, not while you are reading this article. Or what do you think?
I met a guy who passionately narrated a story about a girl he was dying for (atleast, those were his words), who refused to comply. So, he told her she was stupid and that husbands are rare. He even coined the phrase "Men Inflation". My goodness! I was speechless.
Husbands are scarce. Really? Honestly, it's a line that amuses me. Moreover, I have vehemently refused to accept it and never will I. Is this why three or more women get married to the same man?
How many men do we see in prayer houses with pictures of women they want to marry at all cost? Anxiety changes nothing. What will be will be. What will not be will not be. There is a man for every woman (Gen. 2 : 25 - Therefore shall man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave unto his wife, and they shall be one flesh).
Due to harsh economic conditions, at 30, some guys are yet to be employed, and I mean their first job. The few lucky ones whom I love to refer to as 'ready-made men' become scarce commodities(excuse me to say).
I want you to understand me. We want to get married, yes. In my own opinion, husbands are not scarce. Men who are ready to settle down and marry a woman; these men are scarce. A man whom you can call your own, lean on, cater for your needs and love you.
Come to think of it, why should you be dependent on a man to provide you with your daily bread? You make a man feel too important when you are lazy. He buys your love and your freedom. You dare not speak about how you truely feel, lest he strips you of your means of livelihood. Use your brain and hands to make a living. Be dependent. Let him see that he is there only to support you. Keep your mind busy.
I'm not saying a woman should not look for a man to marry her. What I'm saying is don't be desperate. Take your time. Marriage is not a playground. Don't try to hook a man with pregnancy, hoping that he will marry you. Don't try to make him marry you with all means. Come on, you are better than that.
Many girls chase after one 'ready-made man'. This gives rise to the perception that men are scarce. I know no one wants to suffer. But please, let's respect ourselves. Don't sit and wait for a man to tickle your ears with lies. Women love deception, yes. It started with Eve and it hasn't stopped since then. May God help us.
This one goes out to all the unmarried women out there. Put your trust in God. At the appointed time, you will get married. Keep on praying. God will see you through. Don't through morality to the dogs, and call it enjoyment. It's high time we stopped this pun called Husband Scarcity. It's unbelievable!
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WHO IS HE

His legs are long; his body is slender. When he is mad, it takes a lot to calm him down. His eyes are bright and shine at night. He can smell you from a dustance. When you want to work, he wants to play. He loves to lick your chin and forehead. When you hold him close, he us warm and tender. He is the most loyal of all creatures. He answers your call, always. Who is he? Your brother? Your father? No, he is neither of those. He is your friend, that beautiful dog.

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WHEN I'M AN AN OLD WOMAN

When I'm an old woman, I will bring so much happiness and joy to each kid just as he/she had brought to me.
I will live with each of them so they can get back the pay of their deeds in full. Oh, they will be so excited.
Wearing my shoes, I will color the walls in reds and blues.
When they are out of reach, I will spill granulated sugar and bleach.
I will stain my clothes with ink and chocolates.
They will snap their fingers, shake their heads and hiss.
Ah, that's when I will hide under the bed.
If you know me well, then you know that I can do all of these and even more.
If you get to know my children, tell them to beware. Oh, they should be very afraid.

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30 December 2014

SPENDING QUALITY FAMILY TIME

I and my spouse spend long hours at work. The children spend their evenings studying or are often out with friends. I am at an age where I don't need to spend time with my parents. There are maids at home to satisfy the children's needs. These (and others too numerous to mention), are the excuses some people give for not being able to spend time with their families.

As I stated in one of my earlier articles <<http://yakadams7.blogspot.com/2014/12/the-home-is-beginning-for-teaching-of.html >>, it's time for parents to ask themselves : “do our children receive our best spiritual, intellectual and creative efforts? Or do they just receive our leftover time and talents, after we have given our all to our church calling or professional pursuits? ”

In most families today, both parents are working or only one is. In the former, children are left in the hands of maids to care for them. While in the latter, the parent at home spends more quality time with the children. This is a very unbalanced equation. As a result, the one who spends more time with the child is endeared.

There are cases where children see their parent(s) once in a blue moon, though living in the same house. You are shocked, right? I know. This is what happens. The parent(s) leave home before the children wake up and they return after the children are fast asleep. Believe me, some children unknowingly refer to maids as "mom".

My greatest fear is the evil that some maids commit when parents are not home. Recently, videos of such barbaric acts have gone viral on the Internet. Children have been molested and exposed to all sorts of vices you can think of.

Of course, as a parent, you need to raise money for the upkeep of your family. But while at it, be sure to create a family time. In families where one parent is the sole breadwinner, we think it's okay if the other is at home taking care of the children. To me, this is not right. Your son might want to talk to you, his father, about a masculine matter and you are unavailable. Or your daughter might need to talk to you, her mother, about a feminine matter and you are unavailable. This is because he/she feels that it is a gender problem. Here, the child confides in friends and we can only hope that the results are positive.

For some, the only family time they have is when they watch television after supper. The attention is not on each other, but on the screen in front of them. In those families where there are televisions in every room, they are not even close to watching television together.
Click <<http://yakadams7.blogspot.com/2015/03/the-importance-of-family.html >> to read my article on the importance of family.

Also, most children don't make it easy for their parents. I know some who spend more time outside the home than their parents do! The only times you see them at home is when they are leaving the house early in the morning and returning late at night to sleep. Hehehe it's not that they are working or they are going for lectures o. It's not funny, though. There are children who spend time alone in their rooms or with their friends more than they do with their families.

Grandparents are the ones who suffer the most. Some only see their children and grandchildren once in a blue moon. Most children don't know their grandparents. Do you know your grandparents? If you don't, ask your parents questions. Some children only get to attend the funerals of their grandparents; some don't even know whether the grandparents are dead or alive. May God help us o.

Let us try as much as we can to spend time with our families. Get to know their challenges and successes. Give help and support where needed. Family is blood. Blood is thicker than water, the saying goes. There are some people who care more for outsiders than they do for their own family members. This is very bad. Help your children, neices, nephews and cousins with their homework, eat breakfast or dinner together, create a one-on-one time with them (atleast once a month) and go out as a family for drinks, movies or do something else that is fun.

Family time does not have to be long, but make it quality and memorable. I know you love your families; we all do. Just be sure to find time out of your busy schedule and show some love. Your parents might not get to read this article, it's okay. You can share what you have read with them and suggest ways to spend quality family time together. They will love it.

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18 December 2014

I'M JEALOUS

I'm jealous
But I'd never admit it
I'm jealous
But I'd never tell him
I'm jealous of what's not mine
Not angry, not upset
Just jealous.
When I think
He likes someone else
I retaliate with
Silence and I-could-care-less
Ha-ha that's so funny
Jealous, I shouldn't be
But I can't help not to be.
The entire time I've known him
I've liked him, more or less
I don't think of him is a lie
I should be his
But no, I'm taken
I think of kissing his lips
And that is a sin!

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16 December 2014

BET ME, I WILL HAVE HER

There is this girl in your school or neighborhood. You tell your friends that you like this girl. Your friends say,"Dude, you can't have that babe. You are not her type". You reply,"I can have her". This argument continues for a while.  One of your friends suggests betting cash, kind or just your pride on the probability of your winning the girl. You feel challenged, so you agree. And ofcourse, the girl doesn't know about the bet.
This is a trend which is in vogue. I have talked to male friends of mine who have agreed that is common,(while stating that it is not all guys that indulge in this barbarous act). If you think that betting to win a girl is a good thing, why do you hide it from the girl? Oh yes, just what I was thinking! It's obvious what the result would be, right?
To most people who would say it is not a big deal, you are mistaken. To the ladies, it is a very big deal because it is an insult. Bet to pass your exams, bet to succeed in life; there are lots of things to bet on, why the hell should you bet on a full-blooded human being, huh?
You see, some guys treat ladies in ways which they wouldn't like their own sisters to be treated. Seriously, just think of it. Every time the girl calls you or smiles at you, you send a report back to your circle of friends. When at last the girl succumbs to your web of lies, (not knowing that she is a trophy), you shamelessly brag about it to your friends and win the prize.
Some males even go to the point of betting to sleep with a girl, which flabbergasts me. Is your head there just to add to your height? Or were your manners cut alongside your umbilical cord? In some cases, the girl says she's not yet ready for sex. You tell your friends about it and bet to sleep with her within a particular period of time.  As soon as you eat the cake, you tell your friends and boost your ego. After all of these, you still go ahead to dump the girl. If you manage to keep her, your friends know each time you sleep with her. This is a cause for alarm and screams IMMATURITY.
This is not the time to demean ladies and paint them as cheap. It is time for you to grow up and be the man you claim you are. As a male friend of mine said, (yes a male friend, not a female friend for those of you who think that I'm writing this only from a female perspective), "For a lady to sleep with you, she is showing you how much you mean to her and the trust she has for you. Although my opinion might be wrong to some people. Ladies need to develop certain rules in life of asking the right questions, because I'm sure if most of them do, the lament of had I known will not come up".
Seriously, guys, you should treat that lady as you would love your sister to be treated. What is that saying again? Yes, I remember. "What goes around, comes back around". You might not know this, but when you tell your friends about your sexual escapades, they undress the girl in their mind's eyes. Yes o, they do. Life is full of ups and downs. Don't add to it by tarnishing the image of an innocent girl who loves you. Rumors about sex spread like wildfire. If you don't even love the girl, atleast respect her. Don't sit, lie, stand, walk in uour group and talk and destroy her future. It might be that you later love her and regret all of these, but if and when she gets to hear it; hmmmmm believe you me, it'll create a vacuum in your relationship. Nobody likes to be played, used or toyed with.
Sex before marriage is a sin before God. So, if you indulge in it and still go ahead to boast of it, just create a mental picture of the situation you are in.
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13 December 2014

Yak Adams

'IT'

My heart
Desires it.
My soul
Yearns for it.
But my hands
Can't reach for it.

It is not you,
It is me.
Or maybe,
It is you.
If only,
It happened earlier.

I'm in a place,
Where I can only wish.
A place very deep,
Where memories flood.
A box of memories,
I created about it.

My 'IT',
Are you possible?
When I think of you,
My body shivers.
To wish and wish,
Is all I can do.

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12 December 2014

TRAINING THE CHILD IN GOD’S WAY:ARE PARENTS UP TO THE TASK?

The home is the beginning for the teaching of the gospel. These include the doctrine of repentance, faith, baptism, gifts of the Holy Spirit, etc.
Parents should teach their children
the power of prayer to strengthen
them
to be morally clean in this challenging
world. Parents should not allow
their children to march out the front
door each morning to face Satan and
his myriad of temptations, without
spiritual backup from prayer. Night
prayer is also of utmost importance.
Teach your children the routine of
prayer.
Another meaningful thing is to
direct their time into productive
gospel-oriented efforts by being
loving, but firm. There may be initial
resistance and complaining but you
need to have the vision and will to
stick with it.
Parents are the immediate role
models of their children. As a parent
who
smokes, cheat, lies and indulges in
other immoral conduct, have you
asked
yourself what you are indirectly
teaching your children? When your
child
decides to stay back from church, it is
your responsibility to make he/she
aware of the essence of church
service. Charity begins at home, they
say. I
beseech parents to take it upon
themselves to raise leaders of
tomorrow,
not menace to the society.
“TRAIN UP A CHILD IN A WAY THAT
HE SHOULD GO, AND WHEN HE IS
OLD, HE WILL
NOT DEPART FROM IT.” – PROVERBS
22:6
It is time for parents to ask
themselves: “do our children receive
our
best spiritual, intellectual and creative
efforts? Or do they just receive
our leftover time and talents, after we
have given our all to our church
calling or professional pursuits?”
Father and mother are titles that will
continue to be revered, worlds
without end.
One may ask, “how about orphans?” I
would like to make it clear that the
context in which I am using ‘parent’ in
this article does not mean ‘a
person from whom one is immediately
biologically descended; a mother or
father.’ I am referring to you who may
be a friend, a brother, an uncle or
a neighbor. You can also assist in
raising up that orphan in God’s way
and
God will reward you real big.
As parents, you can proceed with the
assurance that God never gives us a
responsibility without offering divine
aid. You might have not been doing
these things. Do not give up; nobody is
perfect and it is not late. Where
there is a will, there is a way. Ask God
for guidance and HE WILL NOT FAIL
YOU. I pray that you may, in your role
as parents, in partnership with God,
become the prime gospel teachers and
examples for your children, in the
name of Jesus Christ, amen.
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